Because we all dream.

Baby is sleeping now.
I put her to bed about an hour and a half ago, and sneaked out of the bed, after I managed to wrangle my nipple out of the bite of her mighty sharp teeth. Painful. I was so upset.

I had to put together this blog, and I took much too long setting up the ambiance. I am an ambiance junky.
I am becoming very intentional about channeling my African chakras and applying said elements into my work. If there is any truth and power in gods, I would like my African gods to be on my side.
 I beckon old and new energy, vibrancy, creativity, when I lay out these materials in my space, and frame my experiences using fabric, patterns, colors, cultures that are so important to our peoples.

Last year I thought, I need to make 2015 a travelling year. I was thinking London, Toronto, Latin America.... After I got my chance to go home, to Nairobi, to my mum.

I need to go home.
I need help with baby.

I need to breathe.
I need to rest.
I need to not worry about what we are going to eat.

I have been meaning to go home.
To take baby home to meet Sam, Carolis, Muthesh, lilly and Ken.....
Before baby is no longer baby.

I was hoping to go home last October. To stay for as long as I could, in the sun and warmth, and escape the unconscionable cold that Michigan winters bring. But I got stuck here. My immigration application process got stalled- is still stalled- because of financial challenges. I have had to re imagine my place and my work this winter.

I cant quite remember what i was doing to occupy myself last fall. Besides minding baby and the house of course. I was just shuffling around, between bedroom, kitchen and living room, cooking something, or changing diapers, or putting on Ubongo Kids for baby.

I fixed up some old sewing machines that were recovered (free.com) by my father-in-law from some Detroit basement during the great August flood last year. I started out well, making my reusable cloth menstrual pads. But I bent or broke too many needles. I got tired. I got intimidated. I could use some help.

I picked my guitar up again. After an almost 2 year sabbatical. I never played after I got pregnant. I was just too sick and sick. It was only when Crystal came over, tuned it and played it as I tidied up my crafts room that I reconsidered.

I know I started. I started to work on these things. Music, Blogging, Podcasting, video shows: all of the things I want to be doing- talking about life and issues with people.


But why am I still on this hamster wheel?

Why do my calves feel warm and wobbly?

Why am I not making any MONEY?

Why, why, why ? (insert tinga tinga tales cartoon melody)


I need to get away from here for a minute.
I need to get away from this cold.
It sucks and I stay in the house all day as a result.

I need to go out and live my dream.
To dress up nice.
To draw my eyebrows, and apply some deliciously dark liner.
To walk into a coffee shop with a sense of self-importance.

I need to change something.
I need to leap into the unknown.

I  bought tickets two nights ago. Akashi and Kai have been living with us since Christmas, and they have gotten me psyched about getting out into the world, and building the kind of workstyle that you love, off the grid.

She was sitting next to me, and I was just looking to see if i could find any $1 tickets somewhere southward,  Atlanta or Alabama or Mississippi. I thought perhaps we could look at it like baby going to her ushago. 
I ended up rerouting to Texas though, because the tickets to Alabama were way out of my league (read $30) and I could get connections to Dallas and Houston for $1 each, and then perch in New Orleans, ideally at a nice hotel by the ocean, sipping shangri-la...

The catch is that the trip takes 3 weeks!
Three of course because I chose my travel dates based on ticket prices.

Ahh.
What have I done did now?!

Tired.

It is work.
Plus it is almost 2am.

Peace till the next.